davin (nivad) wrote,


An open letter to the Spanish restaurant industry:

Dear Spanish restaurant industry. I know you're quite busy with all those cigarettes that need smoking, but I have been in your country for some time now and I have a few suggestions for areas that need improvement.

Diversity. I don't have my dictionary so I don't know what the equivalent word in Spanish is, but you should look into it. While it's nice that I can get a jamon y queso bocadillo in any restaurant I should happen to stumble into, occasionally adding other food items to your repertoire would be a really good idea. And no, offering a queso bocadillo or a jamon bocadillo does not count. You have to use completely different ingredients.

Another word you should look into is "condiments". While not a proper food item in and of themselves, they can add quite a bit to a meal. Although it is not strictly considered a condiment, lettuce can also add a lot to a sandwich.

While we're on the topic of sandwiches, don't serve me one that I have to eat with a knife and fork. I mean, if it can't be held in the hands without falling apart, what really was the point of making it into the form of a sandich in the first place?

Wait, don't leave just yet. I have a few more words for you...

Words such as "breakfast". Contrary to what you may have heard, a piece of toast and some butter do not constitute a proper breakfast. Adding a single hard-boiled egg does not make it an "American" breakfast. An American breakfast often does contain eggs (note the plural - eggs), but also has bacon, hash browns, pancakes, sausage, orange juice, syrup, and yes, toast. The more of these things that are included, the better. Especially the bacon.

Now I have only one more word for you, but it's a biggie: service. You should really give this one a try. I appreciate the fact that you're not in my face every five minutes, but a little attention every, say, half hour or so would be nice. This includes when I first arrive and when I've asked for the bill. Speaking of the bill, I realize you aren't working for tips, but I also realize it's because service is included in the bill. Since I'm already paying for it, how about providing some? Also, washing the dishes between meals is a concept you should really try. Smiling isn't mandatory, but if I'm really causing you great personal inconvenience by coming into your restaurant and trying to order some food, perhaps you should seek another line of work.

Well, that's good for starters. If you can work on these things, I will try not to eat only at foreign chain restaurants for the rest of my visit to Spain.

Thank you for your time.
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